• Mood: hopeful to say the least
• Music: white houses, vanessa carlton
• Hero of the day: mom!
• Clothes: PJs

 Hey guys,

i recently discovered how much people (or atleast i) use my abs daily. that would be alot. i have a pot belly now, becase my abs are relaxed instead of slightly tight. but we'll get to that later

ok, breifly, grandma and grandpa couldnt make it. the weather was just too cold, their plane... plain? ugh, anyway, it wouldve frozen and crashed... then burned, so we didnt want that, so the sent a gorgeous bouquet? of flowers and a card saying 'Get we'll soon, All our loue Grandma + Grandpa' the flourist guy who wrote that needs to work on his (or her) penmanship, i think...

um... then on yesterday, the big day we were all waiting for to be over, lets see:

we woke up at 5 AM which in my book is NOT an hour of day nor night.... just some wierd section of its own, along with 4M...
we arrived at the hospital, Mary Washington Hospital, at 6-ish,  fancy place for blood-suckers paradise, if you ask me *clears throat*, ill get to that later...

by the time they gave me the stuff to knock you out, i was kinda nervous, not about the operation, but its effets... affects?

anyway, i remember being rolled in the OR and then the doctors talking to me, and to eachother, very nice for blood-suckers.... anyway, i woke up to pain and discomfort, of course i couldnt exactly call it 'waking up' the rest of the day was full of naps, pain, discomfort, and very strange complicating and utterly confusing dreams that made no sense whatso-ever.

you know, the gas they give you to make you sleep, does give you dreams, but the stuff through the IV does.... im not sure which i perfer...

ok, obviously both have bad side-affects? i have been acting like a brain-damaged baby... or old person... just re-visiting my childhood.

i waitched 'Little Bear' and 'Franklin' and 'Lazy Town' today. although i cant completely blame lazy town on the operation. Hey, its got ok tumbling, nice singing, horrible songs and mind-numbing plots... if you could call them plots at all. just the thing a girl in recovery needs, right?

ok, about he baby or old person thing. yesterday i could get up, move at all, really, or even use the bathroom without help. yes, as humiliating as it sounds, i adjusted quite well, actually. thats what freaks me out. i didnt mind having my mom help me dress or eat... i blame it on the fluids they were putting into my bloodstream, you see, they help you 'relax' basically they turn you into a brain-dead zombie.

ok, and the eating and using the bathroom part was... were most interesting. the rule was i had to use the bathroom and keep food down befroe i could go home. well, i found out what happens if you break that rule. they hook you up to a bag and you cant go home. it turns out that you have a bag on (or in) while when? you're under the knife. gee, musta missed that part, cause i woke up sore... gosh, see, my intellectual average is low and dropping....

anyway, i guess i went home early, then cause i had ordered a bagel (which actually wasnt half bad) and creamcheese (which was more than half bad). i had scraped off the creamcheese and ate the bagel only to go home and puke it right back up.

so, all day yesterday i had had nothing but 2 saltine cracker, and that was only so then i cold take some pain killers. which didnt so much as kill pain as it hooked up and joined the Let's - Make - Jess - Hurt party. wow, that was a hard to typ sentance...

heh, if Mr.T saw that last sentence he'd be disappionted in is A+ pupil.

so today, i actually got to get up to standing and walking. then after lunch (and a nap) i proceeded to the 'walking and breathing at the same time' level. you see, it used to be that breathing hurt if i took in too big of a breath, then it just hurt whether i breathed or not, and right now its not hurting too bad, which is either a gold star for the painkiller or my road to recovery is getting shorter. i'm betting its the painkiller.

gee, sorry if im sounding kinda.... well... gray on you guys, but i think i know how sirius feels in book five, just before he broked away (wow, i think i set a record, 'broked') to save his godson only to be killed by his evil cousin with a bad hair day.

only, the only cousins i have is a 3 year old in texas and an 18 yearold in college across the country... i guess you could also say its across the continent, but that would make way for more spellin errors.

lemme take a break and ill get right back to you guys.

eh, dont think my stomache cared too much for that break.

ok, where was i? ok, continents and bad hair days, gotchya

hehe, gotchy-yuh, hehe, sounds japanese... however, its a language i most recently learned called americanese. ow, i find myself talking to my belly lately, saying things like 'what is goin on down there?' and 'Dont make me come in there'

of course, i think it would be interesting to see how i could 'come in there' when i can even bend half way over or laugh without disturbing Mr.Touchy, Mr.Touch-Me-Not, Mr.BigRedAndIrritable, and who could forget Mr.Cranky.

those woul be the pet names for my 4 incisions, so yes, i got laparascopy and as the doc puts it, the operation went fine.

so, heres what im shooting for. My Road of Recovery ends at being able to sit, stand up and walk without pain or discomfort - and taking painkillers to hidethe pain would be cheating. dont let me forget that one. as my favortie quote from Dr.House goes 'I dont have a pain managment problem, just a pain problem, but, of course, I'm too high off Vicadin all the time, it'd be hard to tell.'

i like House, its a good tv show. and, have you noticed, i used my new word 'favortie', my favortie fake word

alright, so i owe my mom a HUGE HUGE HUGE one and my dad a pretty big one, too. of course my brother is still in dept to Me, but i wont hold it against him.. too often...

mom has been the obsolete (hey, did i actually just spell that right? HA! im not in my right mind and i spell things i usually cant, how flipped is that... so i guess you could say my left mind has its strong points, too... unless of course i DIDNT spel that right, then it would just be expected) greatest she helped me, she helped me and she helped me even more. she's been there for me when the cute therapy dog, that reminded me too much of Max, at the hospital could not. she helped me at 2Am move upstairs into my room to sleep, and stayed home to make sure i was ok.

i o u, mom


and i was just thinking how the itchy rash smiley advertisement smiley guy on the left of the screen has nice blue eyes...

ok... moms home, yay.

ok, so my goal is to be wel enough to see a movie tomorrow. the... criteria? for that would be i have to be able to sit and walk well enough, painkiller helping is ok, and who knows? i always liked to think of myself as a fast acheiver. who knows? maybe i CAN go to gymnastics next tuesday. anyway, back to the movie, Ice Princess

now, i realize that if what i think what the plot is really is the plot, then the moviue would totally suk, but ill still enjoy the outside air, popcorn extra butter that i hopefully wont throw back up and just the fact that im not inside anymore, im on my feet and doing things - other things than just practising walking and breathing at the same time.

im gonna go talk it over with mom

BYE!

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